2004-02-15 - 10:49 p.m.

(names changed to protect the innocent)

So, my job� my job is on my mind. What can I say about my job? I like my job again. I like editing better than writing, at least in this job.

So we started out on this new project right after the new year. The new year, a cushy time of sitting around eating Christmas cookies, then a couple weeks off, a trip to Florida, what the heck� and then back to our cubicles, a new project to tackle, with Mary Jane and Joan and Joe.

Joe�what can I say about Joe? I want to respect him, I really do. He played a part in a community theater group shortly after we arrived, and he danced in a wig and a hula skirt. After that his back went out and he was gone for long stretches�he is a nice, nice guy, I keep telling myself. I overheard him calling the IT department the other day, saying, �Todd, now I know we�ve been over there before, but I needed to ask you again, what do you do when it asks you if you want to revert to the saved document and you don�t want to lose what you�ve been working on?" I went over there after he hung up and said, �Joe, you just click no, you don�t want to revert to the saved document.�

But it was a whole new ballgame, the group had splintered apart, the Voyages in English crew down one hallway, the others off working on their own projects, no reason to talk to the catechists any more.

The project went on and we weren't quite clicking, the deadlines were coming too fast and we were used to the lap of luxury. Joe was talking real fast but scatterbrained as ever, always walking a little quicker than necessary, bouncing as he walked. I, meanwhile, just couldn�t get myself excited about writing this damn TE, and the writing came slow as tar. Meanwhile the student book editors were flailing. One day Joe suggested we all switch jobs and we said, nah, we�ll figure it out.

Into the void stepped Joan, who is armed with Confidence and Power, the general who has been ushered in to save a sinking ship, and having come in and done so, holds us all under her gaze, a friendly gaze, but knowing. She takes me and Jenn into her office and says I�m putting you over there and you over there, and here�s my speech on Joe. You guys need to respect Joe a little more. Well, Jenn complained about him, she feels disrupted by Joe, the way he runs around to every cubicle and asks everyone if they can come to a meeting. Joan turned to me, asking, �Do you find this, David?� I just stared into space and stammered, because I pity Joe, and even though he�s generally in the way, the man is a nice guy and I don�t want him to lose his job. So we said yes, Joan, we�ll respect Joe, and went on with our jobs.

I realized today that I am very good at my job. Yesterday I received my manuscript, which Mandy and Joe had wrestled over for two weeks, and I rewrote the first two lessons in a few hours. I explained coherently what makes a good personal narrative, creating new categories such as coherence and structure. It was even a little fun.

So, Jenn, my new cubicle neighbor Jenn� I could be friends with Jenn. She is a different breed than I, but aren�t they all? I feel more distant to all of them; I miss Aaron, who�s moved down the hall, and the feeling of unity that came with the Xavier Project. I never talk to catechists any more. I miss them, Jeanette and Tom. I wish I would go over and talk to them more often.

But this Voyages team, it is a fine team. It has Karen, and Cindy, and Elizabeth. They make me happy, tell me I�m soothing, that if David�s worried then we�re all in trouble. I never let on that it�s just ambivalence, that I just don�t care if I succeed or fail. I was failing at the TE, but perhaps I can succeed at this new task, and Mary Jane at the helm, fearless as always, leading us Voyaging off into open seas of the English language.

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